Outside
by Citruline
Summary: "Something had happened and that something was separating you from others./It was as if you hadn't existed./ But you knew the truth, after all, you were yourself and real." Gray-centric. 2nd PoV. Gray/Natsu if you squint.


The sun was hiding behind the dark, grey clouds when you noticed it.

Something had happened and that something was separating you from others.

It was as if you hadn't existed.

But you knew the truth, after all, you were yourself and _real_.

Not that anyone else would notice – you weren't seen. Almost as if you were transparent to everybody else.

The rough feel of the wall under your palm was solid, familiar and so, comforting. You weren't gone.

You were there, real.

Then why was it that you could no longer enter the guild? The doors were open, the familiar feeling welling inside of you, yet, the cold barrier that separated you from your home, your family. It wasn't right. So instead of the welcoming feeling you were so used to, there was only a black chasm, seemingly waiting for you to fall inside.

Not that it was going to happen any time soon… the barrier prevented that.

It's confusing.

Frustrating.

Then you hear voices, approaching. Very familiar ones.

Natsu, Happy and Lucy. They're coming your way. And haven't see you – this isn't surprising but saddens you all the same.

Why?

Also, why did it have to be such a timing?

Just after you had that one conversation with Natsu. Seen the slightly surprised yet pleased expression on his face that made you wonder if you should punch or kiss him.

It _hurt_.

Your temple throbbed, haziness seemed to take in your thoughts. A slightly confusing spiral that made your stomach turn, the urge to throw up rise.

For a brief moment you didn't mind the cold barrier at your back – it was the only thing keeping you upright. And at the same moment Natsu walked past you. His arm brushed against yours. And your throat tightened at the same time that bile did rise to your mouth. You didn't oppose instinct, doubling over and vomiting.

The smell was quite rancid, your nose scrunched up in distaste but, looking back up, you see that your friends are _gone_.

Rain started falling, the sun having finally set.

And you're wet.

The cold doesn't reach you but the sodden clothes are uncomfortable, clinging to your skin. And, you should be able to go _inside_.

You run a hand through your hair, pulling it back momentarily. And start walking around the building. _There has to be some way to get inside_.

Alas, returning to the entrance of the guild you realize that, no, there was not.

Light flickers from inside the guild, the chasm that obscured everything becoming a transparent grey. It's almost beckoning for you to see if you can get inside.

Taking one step forward you are able to pass the threshold of the guild. But you're almost as if walking in a tunnel, surrounded by that transparent grey glass. You touch it. It's the same feeling from before. Cold and solid – so much so that no-one can break it.

 _But I will_.

Your mind set, you step further inside the guild.

The sense of familiarity that washes over you as you get to the main room leaves a hollow inside your chest. You're _there_. But not really.

The warmth, noise and merriment are something you can almost feel. _Almost_.

Everyone's having so much fun. Why can't you?

Then again, what happened that made you seemingly disappear?

Natsu comes out of nowhere and the headache returns. You catch yourself on the wall but it's at that moment that everything begins to shake.

You're pushed.

Back and back and it feels like the glass walls are pressing down on you. And…

In the blink of an eye you're outside.

Again.

Looking into the chasm.

It's darker now, a wave of something evil coming from it. Dark, glossy tendrils shoot out of it. Instinctively you call your magic but, that's another wrong thing. It doesn't come. It _doesn't come_!

Darkness engulfs you.

And you know no more.

* * *

You open your eyes, a shiver running down your spine.

You're back.

Sitting at your table, with your friends and noise and food. It's as if nothing had happened. Yet…

You feel in your gut that something's very wrong.

And you're still back, outside of your life.


End file.
